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The way you behave and treat the person you’re with on a date can play a big part too.

Use these 20 ways to better your conversation and you’ll definitely leave your date feeling warm and happy. Pick a date spot that both of you would like, and make sure you arrive on time.

The best communication occurs with an even and equal exchange between two people. Getting to know someone new is like peeling an onion one thin layer at the time. But some people, overeager to get into deep and meaningful conversation, go too far too fast.

Think of conversation as a tennis match in which the players lob the ball back and forth. They ask personal or sensitive questions that put the other person on the defensive. If feeling inhibited is a problem for some people, others go to the opposite extreme: they use a date as an opportunity to purge and vent.

Should the relationship evolve, there will be plenty of time to get into weighty topics. When a person reveals too much too soon, it can give a false sense of intimacy.

In reality, premature or exaggerated revelations are due more to boundary issues, unresolved pain, or self-centeredness than true intimacy. Maybe your first date questions will lead you to discover that this person is your soul mate—or maybe not.

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For example, work, his or her family, hobbies, pop culture, and favorite music are all surefire bets. If you’re savvy, you’ll realize that certain questions–even the most basic ones—have the ability to tell a lot about a person.

They scan the room, menu, and table setting, only occasionally making eye contact. The key to having a positive experience is relaxed conversation, and that can be helped along with some well-chosen first-date questions.

Biggest clue of all: The salad course is punctuated by strained silence and forced small talk. Before we get to those, let’s review a few general guidelines for dating discourse: Listen as much or more than you talk.

(L-r) RYAN GOSLING as Jacob and EMMA STONE as Hannah in Warner Bros. w=670" data-large-file="https://scstylecaster.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/crazy-stupid-love-movie-image-ryan-gosling-emma-stone-02.jpg? w=1024&h=683 1024w, https://scstylecaster.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/crazy-stupid-love-movie-image-ryan-gosling-emma-stone-02.jpg? w=2048&h=1366 2048w, https://scstylecaster.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/crazy-stupid-love-movie-image-ryan-gosling-emma-stone-02.jpg? w=150&h=100 150w, https://scstylecaster.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/crazy-stupid-love-movie-image-ryan-gosling-emma-stone-02.jpg? w=670&h=447 670w, https://scstylecaster.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/crazy-stupid-love-movie-image-ryan-gosling-emma-stone-02.jpg? w=768&h=512 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px" to be a precursor to an actual relationship, first dates are also mini-interviews disguised as social outings, whether we like to admit it or not. They’ll also further loosen the two of you up and can lead to some funny, entertaining conversation.

Pictures’ comedy “CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE.” a Warner Bros. " data-medium-file="https://scstylecaster.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/crazy-stupid-love-movie-image-ryan-gosling-emma-stone-02.jpg? That’s why figuring out what to talk about ahead of time with a list of good first date questions and conversation starters is so important. Are you more of a TV person, or do you prefer movies? Depending on the above answer, ask what they’re watching, or what they’ve seen lately.

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